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  • Writer's pictureRobin WillowMoon

A Beautiful Surprise

One of the many blessings I have discovered during this post breakup time was the genesis of a new friendship in a very unlikely place. I have grown to cherish my new friend, the Xnarc’s first wife. She is a beautiful soul with an amazing heart.

As most narcs do, I only heard his version of their relationship; much like ole Norma Jean is probably hearing his version of ours. I am sure she has heard by now how horrible I was to be married to and how miserable I made his life. She will become his next tale of woe I am quite certain. He has not clued into the fact that the common thread to these bad relationships he has is HIM. Not sure he will ever see that fact, but so not my problem anymore.

As his first wife and I began to talk, we found we had so much in common. She and I are more free spirited and doing just fine on our own. We are very close in age, so share common memories of the times we grew up in. Turns out at several points in our life we lived/worked in the same community. Her daughter and I are close as well. She has told me a few times that I was a lot like her mom. I am honored by that comparison.

We had a really nice chat today on the phone as she lives a few states away. We try to talk every few weeks. A while back we did (at my request) have a few of “those” conversations like…..”was he like this with you?” It was actually very helpful for me to receive some validation that he behaved poorly with her as well and gave her the same amount of love and attention he gave me, absolutely none. It made me realize the issue was him, not me. She will never know how much that helped with my healing. I am sure it was hard for her to talk about her time with him, but being the wonderfully kind woman she is, she revisited that not so nice time to help me.

While my time with him was very painful, especially in the wake of his discarding me, I have had over this past year many blessings come my way to help me heal. She was very much a beautiful surprise.

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